Gather Round’s first ever Sicko Saturday treats Adelaide Oval to a day of gloriously bad football

If you happen to did not know higher you’ll have sworn it was a typo in your fixture card.

A scroll down the listing of video games and venues took you to Saturday at Adelaide Oval, and the curious pairing of Carlton-West Coast into Melbourne-Essendon.

There is not any rule that claims the video games on the 53,000-seat Adelaide Oval must be the marquee ones of the day, nevertheless it does make logical sense. And but, right here we had been.

The reigning premier Brisbane had been despatched to Norwood together with the Bulldogs, and to no person’s shock performed out one of many video games of the 12 months.

Granted it made a bit extra sense to ship the Kangaroos and Suns to the Barossa, however either side had been projecting up this 12 months and performed prefer it out Tanunda method.

Again then they could not have predicted it, however by the point all of us gathered for this around the 4 groups enjoying on centre stage on Saturday got here in with a mixed season file of 1-15.

Both by unhealthy luck or unhealthy design, the AFL had created its first ever Collect Spherical Sicko Saturday — a double-header to be savoured solely by the truest and most wicked footy nuts.

A part of the reward of Collect Spherical is the chance, in case you have the means and can, to absorb a large spectrum of video games and groups. In doing so you’ll be able to actually begin to get a way of what good soccer seems like when in comparison with the remainder.

On Saturday, Adelaide Oval acquired nothing however the remainder. And in a gross method, it was fairly charming.

It could have been silly to anticipate anything, however the early one between winless Carlton and winless West Coast was a catastrophe. If there is a worse sport this 12 months, simply hope you do not by chance watch it.

So many poor choices, after which so many errors when the precise determination occurred to be made. The Blues had been clearly the superior crew however wanted time to persuade themselves of that reality.

Dropping, it appears, is an awfully laborious behavior to interrupt.

As soon as they figured it out it was an unglorified coaching drill for Michael Voss’s facet as they racked up stats that even the coach himself described as “extraordinary”. However the numbers could not do that sport justice.

Figuring out a low ebb from the afternoon is hard. Was it Charlie Curnow lacking a five-metre handball to a teammate in an open purpose and by chance dashing a behind?

It may have been Jake Waterman making an attempt to sidestep Mitch McGovern on centre wing, solely to neglect to truly change instructions earlier than operating straight into the Carlton defenders’ arms.

Perhaps it was Jack Williams’s mind overheating and shutting down when on their lonesome 20 metres from purpose, neither passing or capturing and as a substitute chipping it to nothing and thru for a degree.

It was a punishing watch at occasions, and the one subsection of the inhabitants to have taken any pleasure from it in any respect could be Carlton supporters. However even their solace was tainted by a concussion to the returning Harry McKay and a severe late damage to Brodie Kemp.

Positives for West Coast? Tom Gross seems promising. Liam Ryan performed nicely. The draft is in about seven months.

With out desirous to sink the boot any additional than crucial, the Eagles are a way off the usual of even the subsequent worst groups. They know this in addition to anybody however discovering some reduction, not to mention a remedy, is proving unimaginable.

What the Demons and Bombers produced could have been much less farcical than the afternoon’s efforts, nevertheless it was solely simply barely higher.

Melbourne specifically is a crew completely misplaced within the wilderness, a shadow of the outfit that received a premiership in 2021 and dominated the primary half of 2022.

Chief among the many Demons’ points is their whole lack of a ahead line, although with the best way they use the ball getting into there it would not matter if David Neitz was nonetheless operating round.

For a crew combating for its season, perhaps even for the long-term way forward for its coach, Melbourne was an entire damp squib within the first half. It was painful to look at.

To their credit score there was a response after half-time nevertheless it was for little. The standard did not match the endeavour, and ultimately a few turnovers and dropped marks rendered all of it null and void.

Essendon was unconvincing however a transparent step above the opposition. There have been durations when the Bombers would flip the ball over two or three or 4 occasions inside their very own defensive 50, however every time be saved by Melbourne’s personal ineptitude.

The Bombers, would not it, get to play West Coast subsequent week on the identical day Carlton faces North Melbourne. Simply in case you could not get sufficient of Saturday.

All of it’s going to give the AFL trigger for consideration when concocting subsequent 12 months’s Collect Spherical fixtures. There should be a solution to keep away from treating the regional video games like second-class matches whereas nonetheless maintaining the cream of the crop within the prime-time slots.

Or perhaps they will simply lean into the Sicko Saturday idea and reserve one Collect Spherical day a 12 months for some correct slop. It’d simply make us savour the nice video games that bit extra.