Rachel “Raquel” Leviss claims that when it got here to her determination to stop Vanderpump Guidelines, Ariana Madix, whose longtime boyfriend, Tom Sandoval, she was caught sleeping with amid season 10, impacted her determination.
As she mirrored on the “horrible scandal” she and Sandoval, 41, have been concerned in earlier this 12 months in a sneak peek at her upcoming podcast, Rachel Goes Rogue, Raquel, 29, regarded again on her “cringy” moments of season 10, admitted it was troublesome slicing ties with Sandoval after their sordid affair, and revealed she was deeply impacted by her cut up from James Kennedy, 31, and his new romance with Ally Lewber.
“I do know what I did was morally mistaken and I get it. I get the anger,” Raquel started on the December 18 preview of her present.
Based on Raquel, she entered a psychological well being facility after information of her affair with Sandoval broke as a result of she wished to deal with her unhealthy habits.
“I spent 90 days in a trauma remedy heart with no telephone, with all new individuals, and dealing with completely different therapists,” she revealed.”I began noticing a sample in my conduct and I wished to vary these issues. I’ve utterly eliminated myself from the filming atmosphere that’s Vanderpump Guidelines, and you’ll not see me [on] season 11.”
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Whereas Raquel determined to not transfer ahead with filming season 11 over the summer season following discussions with producers, she stated it was truly a mistake filming season 10 as a result of her breakup with James was so contemporary.
“I ought to have taken the time to heal and discover a therapist, and I did the fitting factor by having a no-contact coverage with James, however after we’re working collectively and filming collectively and he’s flaunting his new girlfriend that he met three weeks after I ended the engagement, that harm, and there have been so many questions operating by way of my thoughts like, did he ever actually love me? How is it doable to like somebody after which recover from them so rapidly?” she questioned.
“I used to be consuming a ton [during] season 10 and this isn’t an excuse … [But] I used to be not in a great psychological area,” she added, noting that she didn’t wish to trigger the identical ache to Ariana, 38.
“Seeing how a lot ache I used to be in interacting with James on digicam and seeing his new girlfriend, I might solely think about the ache I might trigger by filming in the identical atmosphere with Ariana. As a result of being concerned with any individual’s boyfriend whereas they’re nonetheless in a relationship is a big betrayal and so painful as it’s, however then to proceed working with these individuals and interacting with them, possibly not even talking, however like, listening to about what they’re doing and seeing your individual that you just cherished a lot and thought that they cherished you simply as a lot as you’re keen on them be conversing with this different individual, it could simply be so catastrophic, and I didn’t wish to try this to Ariana,” she said. “I didn’t wish to put her in that place.”
Raquel additionally didn’t wish to work together with Scheana Shay, 38, who she continues to accuse of assaulting her in March after studying of her and Sandoval’s affair, which Scheana denies.
“With the forged, I don’t have many boundaries, however bodily violence is crossing a boundary for me, and should you assault me, I’ll lower you out of my life,” she defined.
Concerning her present relationships together with her former Pump Guidelines castmates, Raquel confirmed she hasn’t heard from any of them, other than Sandoval, who despatched her a “blissful birthday” message on Instagram in September.
“He couldn’t have reached out to me through textual content as a result of I blocked him the day that I received my telephone again after remedy, however he might have DM’d me as a substitute of creating a public remark, and I’ve been eager about that loads,” she shared. “And I feel, for him, as a result of I’m simply making an attempt to place myself in his sneakers, like was he doing this to be like, spiteful or was he doing this to be like, ‘I would like the very best for you,’ as a result of it looks like it might go both approach.”
Whereas Raquel is not talking to Sandoval, she stated it wasn’t simple slicing him out of her life.
“It was a tough course of for me to utterly lower him out of my life as a result of the story I might inform myself about our relationship that we had, it appeared so particular and it appeared so actual,” she stated, “however while you take a look at the chilly, laborious information and write them down on a bit of paper and see all of these purple flags clear as day, that may break you out of your denial, and as soon as I used to be damaged out of denial and understand how manipulative he’s.”
“I couldn’t put myself in a state of affairs the place at my most susceptible state, it could simply most likely get me again into these previous patterns that I’m making an attempt to interrupt free from,” she continued. “Taking a step again and eradicating myself from the chaos has allowed me to achieve some readability, truly a variety of readability on the state of affairs.”
Wanting again at season 10, Raquel stated it was “actually troublesome” to observe.
“I’m simply cringing at all the issues and all the moments that they caught on digicam. It’s actually embarrassing,” she confessed. “However I see a woman that’s going by way of ache and doesn’t have the fitting instruments to sort out it and she or he’s coping in the way in which that she seems like her wants are being met by somebody who’s giving her adoration and a spotlight.”
Rachel Goes Rogue premieres on Monday, January 8, 2024, wherever you get your podcasts.